Honestly, I think the safest way for Larian to no is to not tie any character to anything in particular but make them available for all. The character I was most interested in before I played this game for the first time was Lae'zel. She was the most unique of all the characters. I would have been disappointed if I played the game and had her romance locked and unable to be triggered for any reason.

That said, I, the player, should still have to make some choices that determine who hits on my main, who wants to sleep with him/her, etc., and my choices should make it easier or harder to accomplish this. In other words, I think the system only needs to be tweaked a little.

For example, if I make a male character, and a male dream love, this should trigger the game that I prefer a homosexual relationship. If I pick male and female, it should trigger heterosexual relationship. This would be by default. Then, if later I am female but I flirt with Shadowheart, but my dream person is male, that should tell the game that I might prefer both and that the game should now leave open all my options. That's the kind of thing I mean. My choices determine who is available for romance so that I don't have Wyll hitting on my male Drow when I clearly chose heterosexual choices, and likewise I don't have Wyll hitting on my female Tiefling when I clearly chose homosexual choices, etc. So don't lock the options for any reason, but maybe tailor the options for romance based on decisions you've made.

Either this or just leave it up to the player to initiate all romance period and don't have any character hit on the main. The main has the option to pursue who they want and leave it at that rather than having the romance options pursue the main.

And, I still think the romances really lack more depth. There needs to be more dialogue and options to spend time alone with the ones you like prior to sex. Maybe have options every long rest to spend time with someone. If your relationship meter is neutral or better they agree. If not, then they refuse. The more you do this, the more your relationship meter might increase or decrease depending on what you talk about during those alone times. These alone times should be what pushes the relationship closer to that full blown romance point, not so much the choices you make all throughout your journey. Those should still affect your romances, but not as much as when you are alone with a person.

This would be the more appropriate time for some of the dialogues already in place too. When Shadowheart bears her secret to you, it should be off alone, during an intimate, private time with just you. If alone, she is mote gentle and less twitchy because it's just the two of you. Wyll could tell you about his secret during such a time. If you respond well, you gain relationship points. After you learn about Astarion, if you ask him to be alone with you then he might be more open about Casador. But then you could have times when the other character initiates it, like Gale wanting to tell you about his other condition. "Let's go somewhere private to discuss." Then based on your responses during your private time, that has a much bigger impact on the relationship.

Then after a certain number of times alone with the person then they might have sex with you if you've boosted the relationship meter to that point by spending alone time with them and getting along with them. But it should take time, more so for some than others. Romance is not really built upon whether a person likes your convos with others. It is built more on whether they like your convos with them, alone, spending alone time with them.

Right now, there is not real alone, intimate time with anyone in the game and then BAM! So its not romance but more like a one night stand and the characters are willing to sleep with you because you made decisions they liked such as refusing to help Sazza, and killing gobbos. Man! Nothing gets Wyll going more than killing gobbos. He really finds that attractive in a person and is willing to bunk with you if you do. Doesn't matter what kind of person you really are, if the gobbo heads roll, he is hot for you.