Personally, I think both sides are kinda right in this argument? BG3 has situations that makes sense and are rewarding for taking different approaches while also punishing in ways that make sense, and situations that are inherently unfair from a game perspective or lack a good core to make it make sense or have solutions that feel rewarding.
I personally felt the Illithid encounter showcases many different approaches with violence, breaking the villagers out of mind control and has a lose situation that makes sense. The githyanki patrol feels like it only has two solutions and one of them is inherently unfair.
