1rst, I think you're exaggerating how much less of the game they're playing, and
2nd, the answer to your question about why I'm playing the game is:
A) for the challenge, which includes the possibility of being hit with negative effects or (gasp) even being knocked out or killed, and
B) for the escape into the story.
Basically, we have very different philosophies on roleplaying games. I accept that you have your own version of fun, but to me, the idea of putting restrictions on the DM to make sure I'm always awake and participating every turn isn't a good time. Sometimes my character gets burned and I have to sit one out, or even make a new character. It happens, and I don't begrudge the system. In fact, it's part of the enjoyment, the challenge, the repercussions. Let the dice fall where they may.
I've been blending BG3 with tabletop in this discussion. In my experience, a full round in tabletop takes ~10-20 min (a couple/few minutes per player + DM), so losing a single turn means doing nothing for 15-30 minutes depending on exactly when you're stunned. Losing multiple turns can easily lead to doing nothing for an hour, maybe more for longer combats. Combat obviously happens faster in BG3, which makes losing your turn less punishing; I'll concede that point. But "less bad" != good.
And I suppose we do. I agree that player death can be tense and exciting. And a player getting knocked out does immediately make the situation so much more dangerous. But death happens infrequently in D&D, certainly not every combat, and getting knocked out (usually) takes multiple turns to reach that point and thus could be prevented by disengaging/etc. Whereas causing players to suddenly lose a turn via a single enemy action (or some ice on the ground), while it does increase tension and encounter difficulty for the remaining players, is not worth the removal of agency from the target player. Especially if this happens often, without much significance given to the occasion/enemy.
Edit: Would it be fair to say that: you think the loss of a turn, while not fun for the player, makes the game overall more fun? Due to increased tension/danger to the party? Or do you actively find being stunned and relegated to watching (and possibly providing comments/advice to other players) fun?
