My experience with this fight is it can go sour pretty quickly, but overall it doesn’t feel as punishing as your description. Wiping out the eggs first is a good idea, although I didn’t manage it in my last playthrough which was actually a lot of fun because your barb can throw the baby spiders at the matriarch. Positioning and push tactics can really help in this encounter, especially using thunderwave to clear the babies. Repelling blast or hitting the web bridges can also really help with some hefty fall damage.
