I still think that the basic AoO is the least of the problems with reactions, by the way. They don't trigger that often to begin with and in most scenarios I'd be almost fine with what we have now...
At least until you pull a "Larian" a rub salt on the wound with a Grymforge golem boss that you have to kite in a specific directions and where a misplaced AoO becomes actively disruptive to the execution of your game plan.

Things that use resources (counterspell, shield, rebuke, etc) are a far bigger problem, because a waste/misuse in that case is far more annoying to the player.

Anyway, I get that you all want to feel useful and come up with your own (convoluted) design solution but I'm fairly adamant about it: anything else that getting an option to confirm/pass on a case-by-case basis will be a failure to me.

It seems to me that there's a disproportionate amount of effort going on to circumvent a problem that doesn't even exist.
It's like witnessing a bunch of people putting together a plan to dig a complex network of tunnels under the sewers so they can leave a building that had all the doors open the entire time.